Making It Work.

Hey bloggers!

 So, things are getting pretty personal. Last week, I said I was in the front row of the emotional roller coaster, but this week I am griping to the front car with all my might as my legs are dangling in the air. Just putting that picture into my head is quite scary.

I am still grasping tightly to the quote that I have mentioned each week so far:

“To be honest, this does not work every day or every week in our relationship but the majority of the time it does and we will make the best of any situation.”

You will probably hear me say this often because this quote describes many relationships, especially among college students. For situations that may be more serious, many cannot follow this. But, for those couples who fight about the stupidest and smallest things, this is definitely something to think about when frustrated.  I know better than to not let the small issues bother me and I will pretty much make the best of any situation. Every time I am hoping that it works out for the best and not for the worst.

The majority of the fights that I have either observed or been a part of were childish and immature. I always stop to think about the following, but I never seem to follow my own ideas:

• ISSUE!  Spending too much time together is never a good thing:

Spending every night together is just ridiculous. Spending time apart makes the heart grow  fonder, doesn’t it? Not every second of every day together is a bad thing, but it is also not a great thing. The reason for spending so much time together may be due to attachment  issues, which can lead to social and emotional issues between a female or male. Maybe your boyfriend or girlfriend came from a broken family or growing up they were any only child so they were by themselves a lot.
SOLVE IT!     Whatever the cause may be it easy to work around the situation, give yourselves some air to breathe and have your own space, because everyone needs it at some point.
  

• ISSUE!    Having “guy” nights and “girl “nights  are a MUST:              

Having a strong relationship is important, but is it also important to form tight bonds with your close friends?  Having a “girl’s night” with the girls who mean the most to you is good because it gets your mind of the bad situations and you can just gossip. Males claim they do not “gossip”, but we all know that they do, whether it is about something or someone. For males, spending time with your “bros” by going out to a bar or having a video game night is essential in keeping your relationship together.

SOLVE IT!  Do something that you would not normally do with your girlfriend or boyfriend. Open up your options and change it up.

• ISSUE!  Do not compete with one another: Who can make who mad first?Growing up our parents told us that if one of our peers hit us, then we should hit them back. But, we grew out of this stage during adolescence, didn’t we? We may have a boyfriend or girlfriend who is an instigator, meaning that they like to start trouble because they find it funny. This is not situation to laugh at. A problem may occur where you both hit or shove one another because you are angry or you may say something that really upset your boyfriend or girlfriend. The key thing here is that you purposely made them mad, and that’s not a healthy thing to do.

SOLVE IT! Try to avoid making each other mad, but sometimes you are caught up in the moment and you cannot help it. Writing down what makes you mad and how you can bypass it may actually help in doing the right thing.

If you every get  stuck in a sticky situation try and remember what I said, because it may help you get out of it. I just wish I could use my own ideas when I’m glued in that situation. Is a relationship such a good thing to have while you are a college student or is it just too much stress to handle with being in a long-term relationship? Now isn’t that something to think about?               

Sincerely yours,

jersey_girl